Forever Walking Alone.

Alone I travel through the wasteland in my heart
As the grievance tears me apart.

Jayden sat with his back to his door as he played mindlessly with his guitar. He was alone again in his home. Sora went off to visit his sickening uncle once again. As he strummed quietly at the instrument in his arms, he mumbled softly whatever lyrics would form in his mind, whether they be made up or sung by a professional singer; any lyrics he could put together; he just wanted to feel better.

Thinking of you and the things you meant to me,
My heart is bleeding. I can't go on.

But feeling better is an understatement. Sora visiting the man who murdered his family, and even himself. The man froze Jayden's heart, and it took many people with blowtorches and picks to thaw it out. Jayden almost wished he never thawed out. Dealing with feelings was too confusing for him.

If I could unwind the wheel of time,
I would have been by your side.

Tears streamed down his face at his past, present, and future. Victor's been a "good" prisoner. At this rate, they could let him go sooner than expected.

"Fuck the law," Jayden stammered through a shaking jaw.

He wondered what would happen if the man got out sooner. What if they met again? How would he deal with that? The murderer meeting the murdered. Surely "upset" would be another understatement.

If I could turn back time,

But even the torture Victor put Jayden though personally couldn't match up to the pain Jayden felt every day from having seen his parents die. He was there. He felt he could have done something about it.

My precious love would be alive.

He wiped at his fallen tears with a palm and sniffled a bit. He still felt quite betrayed having Sora leave him alone every so often, even if for a little while, to go see that bastard. Fuck, he was torn at the seams.

This empty void inside my heart
Grows day by day. I have nowhere to turn
To ease the pain.

God, he was so confused. He couldn't keep a strand of thought untangled with the others. Flashbacks shot through his mind and forced him to relive whatever his mind decided to play for him. Visions of himself being beaten, violated, to scenes of him alone, flashing to scenes with his friends, and lastly, pain poured over him at memories of his parents. The pain was never as bad when he thought of the day of their death as it was to remember them alive.

Remembering the smile you used to
Give me, and your laughter that could
Light my way home.

"Fuck!" he screamed, trying to pull out of the memories, "Go away!" He begged for the memories to leave. He was drowning in the pain of regret and having to feel everything all over again.

If I could unwind the wheel of time,
I would have been by your side.

He moved his guitar off his lap and crawled towards his bed, tears pouring from his eyes only to trickle off his chin and stain the floor with its salty substance. He crawled desperately and fell with his face buried in his pillow.

If I could turn back time,
I never had a chance to say good-bye.

He cried heavily, sobbing muffled sobs into the pillow. He never liked hearing himself cry, no matter the circumstances. His pillow grew wet with tears and he could taste the salt at his lips.

I have cried and mourned my loss.
My heart keeps beating only for you.
Am I strong enough to fight on?
Without your love, I stand...

Into his pillow, he screamed violently, having his curses echo throughout his room, and even with the door closed, throughout the rest of the house.

I stand empty and alone.

But when he had no more tears to shed, his sadness turned to anger. If he had to see Victor again in his life, the man would pay. He would pay dearly for taking his life from him, forcing him into a new person, a new character, and causing his surroundings to transform with him.

So my love, watch over me now.
My rage catches fire. I will strike them down.
I will avenge you, oh, vengeance so sweet.
That's my last gift for you.

The pillow he hugged moments ago became his punching bag, and then tears began to flood his face once more. He was alone in this house. There was no one to hear. There was no one to listen. The house was empty, just as he felt. Oh, how he wished he hadn't felt. What he'd give up to stop feeling. Anything...But he had nothing left.

I'm forever walking alone.